Lost

i feel utterly and completely lost... and i am not sure how to feel about it. Two months ago, my relationship started to tear apart. now i would be remiss if i said that i had no small part in it...fact is, i did... the love of my life told me that she did not want to be with me anymore, after 18 years. and yesterda, she told me to leave for a few days... it has been less than 24 hours, and i miss my littles so very much! at the same time am concerned about where i went so wrong with my relationship and with my oldest kids. I work hard to provide for them...and enjoy every minute that i spend with them...i like to unwind and be able to shut off from time to time... Why can't she see that i am only human and quite imperfect? why does she not understand that both of us lost site of ...well us... i am at once ultimately humbled, deeply saddened, and above all else feel lost in the world... i am grateful for my cousin who is letting me stay for a while...for a work place that actually has showers and other facilities... i need to see the smiling face of my beautiful little girls...and a great big hug from my "daddy miny"... I have no clue what the plan is, but i will move forward...they say that no obstacle is presented to you that you cannot overcome...i am not sure about this one...